Atlanta started out the first jam edging to a 1-0 lead with Thunder Enlightenin moving quickly into the pack to get the first point of the bout, before cutting the jam off.  Mistilla the Killa countered with a 3-1 jam in the second jam for Houston, tying the game up 4-4. Houston then shut down a hard-hitting team from Atlanta the next three jams and took a 13-4 lead.

Death By Chocolate came up with an 11 point jam, while the Merchant of Menace took lead jammer status for Atlanta and scored eight points in the sixth jam.  Thunder Enlightenin took a 10-0 jam in the seventh jam, narrowing the lead for Houston to 24-22. The teams slugged it out for the next two jams with Houston gaining only two points and a 26-22 lead after the ninth jam.

Atlanta rallied back with a 4-0 jam by Thunder Enlightenin to tie the game up at 26-all in the tenth jam, and the Dirty South Derby Girls took a 31-26 lead on a 5-0 Demi Gore jam.  The squad from Georgia took its biggest lead of the night with a 4-0 jam by Merchant of Menace in the 13th jam (35-28).  DeMentia countered with a 12 point jam for Houston after the Atlanta jammer was sent to the penalty box.  That made the score 40-35 after 14 jams.

N Timid Ate Her followed up with a 5-0 jam in the 15th jam, but the team in blue would strike back with three lead jammer-statuses in a row narrowing the lead to 49-47 in favor of Houston.  Mistilla the Killa scored a seven point jam in the 19th jam, and Demi Gore would counter with 3 points in the final jam of the half to narrow Houston’s lead to 56-50.

Starting off the second half, Houston Roller Derby had a couple of blockers in the penalty box. The strategy was for Houston to execute a little jammer on jammer defense that was somewhat succesful as Atlanta scored a 3-0 opening jam by Merchant of Menace to narrow the HRD lead to 56-53.  Demi Gore threw a 2-0 jam at Houston, to close the score to a 56-55 margin in the second jam.

Mistilla the Killa countered back for Houston with an 8-3 jam to move the score out to 64-58 lead.  Houston then outscored Atlanta 18-1 in the next three jams including a 7-1 jam by Mistilla that put Houston up 82-58 after the seventh jam.  But Atlanta scored the big jam of the night as the Houston jammer was sent to the penalty box, along with two other blockers, and Demi Gore posted a 15-0 jam to narrow the lead back to 82-73.

The crucial run of the night took place in the next several jams. Death By Chocolate, normally known for her amazing side-to-side moves while jamming, entered a stretch of several jams as a blocker.  She attacked the Atlanta front wall effectively, and helped her jammers pick up some big points.  N Timid Ate Her scored Houston’s largest jam of the night in the ninth jam of the half with 14 points, and in the 11th jam DeMentia scored 10 more points, moving the HaRD Knocks lead to 106-81.

Just as the Houston fans thought the home team had established control of the bout, Atlanta chipped away with a couple of four point jams by Merchant of Menace and Thunder Enlightenin to narrow the lead to 19 points. DeMentia scored a 5-0 jam in the 15th jam, and Death By Chocolate added an 8-0 jam for the home team and the lead expanded to a 121-93 advantage.

Both teams slugged out scoreless jams for the next two jams with DeMentia being sent off the track in the 19th jam, and Thunder Enlightenin joining her in the box. In what was a change in the WFTDA 4.0 rules under which this bout was being played, it was thought that the second jammer would enter the penalty box and the first jammer would come right back out. But there are some exceptions to this rule, and that happened in one of the first interleague bouts played under the new rules.

Because the jam was whistled off before Thunder Enlightenin made it to the penalty box, DeMentia could not come out of the penalty box. So the final jam of the night started with 38 seconds left on the clock.  When the last blocker had cleared the pivot line after the jam was started, DeMentia then came out of the penalty box, and Thunder Enlightenin started officially serving her 43 second penalty.

DeMentia was called for a blocking from behind minor penalty that would guarantee when she broke out of the pack, she couldn’t cut the jam off with lead jammer status. While she would pick up some points in the final jam, a physical Atlanta blocking squad would nail her with several hard blocks. Thunder Enlighten picked up eight points to DeMentia’s six points. When the final whistle blew, the official score was posted on the board at 127-101 in favor of Houston.

Top scorers for Houston were DeMentia with 41 points, Mistilla with 33 points, Death By Chocolate with 28 points, and N Timid Ate Her with 25 points. Leading blockers for the home team included Nawty Dread Knocks, Miss Lead, Becky Booty, and Sinister Sista.

The leading scorers for the Dirty South Derby Girls included Thunder Enlighten with 42 points, Demi Gore with 32 points, and Merchant of Menace with 27 points. All individual scoring stats are unofficial. Top blockers for Atlanta included Queen Looseyateefa, Sk8 Outa Compton, Tanya Hyde, Switchblade Souisie, and Shannihilator.

The next action for Houston Roller Derby will be at Kicks Gym in Houston on May 16th, as the Psych Ward Sirens skate against the Bayou City Bosses, and the Burlesque Brawlers take on the Hotrod Honeys of the Texas Rollergirls. Atlanta will also be in action on May 16th as the Dirty South Derby Girls host the Dominion Rollergirls of Virginia Beach, Virginia and league teams the Sake Tuyas skate against the Apocalypstix at the Yaarab Shrine Center auditorium in Atlanta.

Phil Arnold,
Roller Derby Is Sport

Currently ranked third in the South Central Region of the WFTDA, the Hard Knocks will be skating against the fifth ranked squad from Atlanta.  Houston features jammers Mistilla the Killa, Death By Chocolate, DeMentia, and N Timid Ate Her.  Top blockers for Houston include Nawty Dread Knocks, Miss Lead, Becky Booty, and Carmen Geddit.

Top jammers for Atlanta include Thunder Enlightnin, JuJu, Alassin Sane, and The Merchant of Menace.  Featured blockers for the Dirty South Derby Girls consist of Queen Looseyateefa, Sk8 Outta Compton, Tanya Hyde, and Switchblade Siousie.

Action will take place at JOPA Sports, 17951 I-45 South in Shenandoah, Texas, just north of The Woodlands on the northbound I-45 frontage road.  Doors open at 6 p.m. with the bout scheduled to start at 7 o’clock.  Tickets are $10 for this bout.  They may be obtained online at Houston’s web site http://houstonrollerderby.com/ or at the door at JOPA Sports.

Rosters are subject to change because of illness or injury on bout day.

Atlanta: Alassin Sane, Amelia Scareheart, Demi Gore, Foxfire, Juju, Killy Wabbit, The Merchant of Menace, Queen Loseyateefa, Shannihator, Sk8 Outta Compton, Spazz Attaque, Switchblade Siousie, Tanya Hyde and Thunder Enlightnin.

Houston: Becky Booty, Carmen Geddit, DBC, DeMentia, Jekyll & Heidi, N Timid Ate Her, Miss Lead, Mistilla, Nawty Dread Knocks, Panty Raider, Rebel Ann, Sinister Sista, Starr Doom and Tex Offender.

Phil Arnold,
Roller Derby Is Sport

Mistilla the Killa

I was certainly sad that I couldn’t make Houston Roller Derby’s first travel game this year in New Orleans.  It of course would have been a great time, and apparently it was a great game with healthy veterans, flashy rookies, and improved pack communication.

Luckily Kerry McClain was there as always to take some great photos and give us a real feel for the battle against the Big Easy Roller Girls.

The visiting team opened up with a ten-point jam by Death By Chocolate, and an 11-point jam by Mistilla the Killa to take a 21-4 lead after two jams.  The key jam of the night occured in the fourth jam of the game after both jammers were whistled off the track for major fouls in the third jam.  Speed O Racer, skating in only her third bout ever, took the jammer helmet cover, and soon after obtaining lead-jammer status, the Big Easy jammer was sent to the penalty box.  The Houston blockers slowed the pack down, and the speed skating flash led to four pack passes and a partial pack pass to score 23 points.  That is most points ever scored in a jam by a Houston Roller Derby jammer.  The score ballooned out to a 40-point lead for HRD, and the HaRD Knocks never looked back.

Death By Chocolate added a 19-point jam in the fifth jam, and a 13-point jam in the 9th jam, with Mistilla adding a 15-point jam in the 15th jam as Houston moved out to a 141-19 lead at half time.

Lacy Underalls scored a five-point jam in the second jam of the second half to raise a roar from the Big Easy home crowd of around a thousands fans, but Speed O Racer came back with a big 19-point jam the very next jam. Trixie la Femme brought the crowd at the University of New Orleans to their feet as the Big Easy jammer was awarded lead jammer, scored points on a pack pass; the defense for the home team shut Houston down in the fourth jam of the half.

However, a ten-point jam by Speed O Racer and a 15-point jam by DeMentia rounded out another solid half by the Houston HaRD Knocks, as they outscored the Big Easy Rollergirls 113-24 in the second half.

Leading scorers for Houston were Death By Chocolate with 77 points, Mistilla the Killa and Speed O Racer each with 62 points, DeMentia with 23 points, and Savage Rose with 19 points.  Top blockers in an HRD team-blocking scheme that consistently controlled the pack were Nawty DreadKnocks and Miss Lead each with seven key blocks, and Goldie BloXX with several key blocks.

The top scorers for Big Easy were Beatrix sKiddo and Lacy Underalls with 13 points each.  Balls Out Betty scored seven points, before having to leave the bout with a collar bone/shoulder injury, and Trixie la Femme scored six points.  Stand out blockers included Pontchatrain Beatch, Coalminer’s Slaughter, Louise ze Animal, and in her first travel team game Deb U Taunt.

Houston was just too much for the derby league from New Orleans Saturday night.  HRD controled the speed of the pack, taking advantage of power jam situations with their speedy jammers. The Big Easy Rollergirls had a great derby bout presentation at a venue with great sight lines for derby fans.

Phil Arnold,
Roller Derby Is Sport

The game opened up tied after one jam, but two nine-point jams by Death By Chocolate and Savage Rose for Houston moved the lead out to 43-21 for the squad from the Bayou City after the seventh jam. An eight-point jam by Mellow Yellow of the NWA Killbillies narrowed the lead to 47-29, but another nine-point jam by Savage Rose helped expand the lead to 81-48 in favor of the HaRD Knocks at halftime.

Houston started the second half with the biggest jam of the game: Death By Chocolate took advantage of a penalty on the Killbillies jammer and score 14 points to move the lead out even further. In fact in the first five jams of the half, Savage Rose scored two 12-point jams and Death By Chocolate chipped in another ten-point jam to move the score up to 129-56. Death By Chocolate added a nine-point jam in the eighth jam of the half, to which the Killbillies’ Mellow Yellow countered with eight-points the next jam. The score was 142-75 at this point, but the Houston defense limited the team from Fayetteville, Arkansas to four points the rest of the night, while scoring 34 points to make the final score 176-79.

The key to the game was the HaRD Knocks blocking. Both teams had jammers in the penalty box probably four times for the whole game, not a huge number considering the new cutting the track majors under WFTDA 3.0 rules. So most of the large jams for Houston were because the defense was keeping the Killbillies’ jammer tied up in the pack. In addition they were able to break their jammers out to score well over 150 points for the regulation WFTDA 60-minute game.

The top scorer for Houston was Death By Chocolate with 73 points. She gained lead jammer status an amazing eight out of ten jams. HaRD Knocks jammer Savage Rose contributed a big scoring night with 60 points, 30-points in each half. Mistilla the Killa added 23 points, and The Prosecutor chipped in with ten points for Houston.

The top blockers included Beth Threat with several jammer takeouts, and with “Offensive Assist Blocks” that freed up jammers for points, or helped jammers break out of the pack. Becky Booty had numerous jammer takeouts and sustained blocks that held the opposing jammer back. Other top blockers for Houston included Miss Lead, Goldie BloXX, and Carmen Geddit. All Houston blockers contributed in what may have been their best interleague blocking game ever.

The top scorers for NWA’s Killbillies were Mellow Yellow with 32 points. Apache Rose with 18 points, and Blazen Glory with 13 points. Pork Pie, Saba Taj, and Dimah Darling turned in some of the better blocking jobs for NWA during this bout.

It should be noted that Northwest Arkansas, probably the strongest team in Arkansas and Oklahoma, ran up against a hungry Houston Roller Derby all star squad trying to move up in the WFTDA rankings so they can make Western Regionals to be held in Houston in October. NWA played a very consistent game, but Houston’s bout may have been their best game ever against another all-star team.

The next bout for Houston will be next Sunday at Verizon Wireless theater in downtown Houston since the HaRD Knocks are in action for the fourth weekend in a row as they host the Texas Rollergirls. Also, the remainder of the league will be divided up into a “Stars versus Stripes” team scrimmage. Action starts at 5 o’clock. Tickets are
$10 in advance from Houston’s web site at http://www.houstonrollerderby.com/ and $15 at the door.

Phil Arnold,
Roller Derby Is Sport

Houston is coming off of a tough weekend of roller derby in Philadelphia, so they are nicked up with injuries. Angel City is ranked 32nd in the WFTDA (Women’s Flat Track Derby Association) while Houston is ranked 24th. This could be a very important game for Houston, which competed against two higher ranked teams the previous weekend at East Coast Derby Extravaganza and will be looking for a win to keep their ranking up, and a little help from the home crowd. The only information I have about Angel City is they are a greatly improved team in the last year.

Doors open at 7 p.m. with the bout scheduled to start at 7:30.

Again, seating is limited, so Houston fans are advised to get advanced tickets if possible. Tickets are $10 and almost sold out. Be sure to get your ticket online before 5pm on Friday! For advanced tickets and more information on the bout, please visit Houston Roller Derby’s web site at http://www.houstonrollerderby.com/.

Rosters are subject to change the day of the event because of injury or illness.

Houston Roller Derby: Becky Booty, Beth Threat, Carmen Geddit, Catazon, Crasher, Death By Chocolate, Jekyll & Heidi, Miss Lead, Mistilla, Nawty Dread Knocks, Panty Raider, Savage Rose, The Prosecutor, and Wreckhell Welch.

Angel City: Alotta Trouble, Annie Afterparty, Cherrylicious, Dia Blow, Diesel, Duchess Von Damn, Estro Jen, Go Go Gidget, Hard Cora, Ja’ass ismine, Ms. D’fiant, Va Va Va Gina, Vodka Toxic, and Sugar N’ Spikes.

(10) Bay Area Derby Girls – 99
(24) HaRD Knocks – 54

(11) Rose City Roller Girls – 154
(24) HaRD Knocks – 44

Sunday, May 11, 2008

(12) Minnesota Roller Girls – 97
(24) HaRD Knocks – 83

(–) OC Roller Girls – 76
(24) HaRD Knocks – 97

(These are UNOFFICIAL scores. The number in brackets is the teams
WFTDA ranking.)

128 – Texas Roller Girls (Austin)
67 – Houston Roller Derby Hardknocks

thecolonel@colonelpod.com

57 – Alamo City Las Tejanas
144 – Assassination City Special Ops

114 – Houston Roller Derby Hardknocks
90 – Dallas Derby Devils Travel Team

141 – Texas Roller Girls (Austin)
52 – Assassination City Special Ops

Stay tuned for the second half of the Governor’s Cup Review!

thecolonel@colonelpod.com

There was no coverage of the final scores, since it went so late. Just coverage of the event.

Here’s the article:

Roller derby all-stars hit to win

Sept. 17, 2007, 3:10PM
By CAROLYN FEIBEL
Copyright 2007 Houston Chronicle
carolyn.feibel@chron.com

Recipe for a roller derby, Texas-style: take a rockabilly fashion sense, skate punk athleticism, and a feminist, grass-roots work ethic. Put the whole thing on old-school quad roller skates, add a dollop of nostalgia, and you have the latest incarnation of a uniquely American sport.

On Sunday, five all-women teams from Texas met up for the Governor’s Cup championship bout at Verizon Wireless Theater. Spectators cheered the local all-star team, the “HaRD KNOCKS,” as they faced off against last year’s champion, the Dallas Derby Devils.

In flat track derby, five skaters¹ from each team circle in a “pack,” trying to block and slam opponents to prevent the opposing “jammer” from scoring by passing the pack. It’s rough, fast and can send skaters skidding into the fans.

“It’s fun to watch somebody come around the corner and give someone a clean shot up into the crowd,” said Charlie Marken, 51, of Pearland.

Marken and his wife are season ticket holders for the Houston league, which is in its second season.

“We came just as a joke, kind of to see, but we got to know some of the girls,” he said.

Marken said he likes the amateur authenticity of roller derby. Pro football and baseball, with its swollen salaries and steroid scandals, have turned him off.

“These girls are just out there for the love of sport,” Marken said.

In Sunday’s first bout, the “Assassination City Special Ops” team from Dallas beat “Las Tejanas” from San Antonio, 144-57. Houston’s own HaRD KNOCKS were slated to compete later Sunday evening. An Austin team and another Dallas team also competed.

Technically a team sport, roller derby offers each skater lots of chances to flaunt her individual style through the adoption of a derby nickname and persona.

Player names such as Mary Choppins, Choko Ono, Grudge Judy, and Strawberry Deathcake indicate the strange mix of flirty aggression and cultural playfulness that defines the sport.

“You definitely want a pun, something that plays off something else, but something that also defines you as a skater,” said Stacy Williams, 35, a black player who chose the name “Death by Chocolate.”

“It’s such an aggression release,” Williams said. “You get on your skates and you hit people and people hit you and you learn you can take that.”

The “hits” are really regulated body checks, with strict rules defining which body parts can be used in a block. Tripping, pushing and fighting are strictly prohibited by a graded penalty system.

The women seem to enjoy the opportunity to be tough, while remaining unabashedly sexy.

“It’s a fresh sport and you see hot, powerful women on wheels,” said Misty “Mistilla the Killa” Moody. The 31-year-old is a lighting designer by day and the league’s trainer by night.

Some skaters came to the sport from the rockabilly or punk music scene, while others simply are athletes looking for a new extreme sport. What they all have in common, however, is a “slight insanity,” said Joy Wallis, who plays as “Tinkerhell” for the Austin league. The national derby revival began in Austin in 2001, and has grown to more than 40 all-female leagues across the country.

“You have to be willing to sacrifice your body, your life,” Wallis said. “It’s about finding that little thing you didn’t know you had inside and getting it out there.”

¹ – I always expect some odd factual errors in media coverage. This is a minor one. I’d count it as: there are 4 skaters from each team in the pack, while the 5th (the jammer) tries to lap them.

Elle McFierce and Goldie Bloxx join The Colonel and Bill Shirley in discussion about the upcoming Governor’s Cup. Five teams will be competing all day for the trophy.

thecolonel@colonelpod.com

Sun Jun 17, 6pm
HaRD Knocks v Alamo’s Las Tejanas
HaRDer Knocks v Austin’s Honky Tonk Heartbreakers

HaRD Knocks 97
Hotrod Honeys 133

http://www.txrollergirls.com/

The Houston Roller Derby Travel Team (HaRD Knocks) is playing the Austin Hot Rod Honeys this Sunday in Austin! Come out, support H-Town, and enjoy the bout! Get your tickets now at www.txrollergirls.com because with all the folks coming from Houston they might sell out!

Houston Roller Derby’s HaRD KNOCKS travel team consists of some of our toughest and fastest skaters… These are the women who compete against other WFTDA leagues across the nation. Fourteen of these dedicated ladies head to Austin this weekend, Sunday May 6, 2007, to take on one of Austin’s top ranked teams.

Becky Booty 866
Beth Threat 23
Beverly Kills 90210
Carmen Geddit 37
Death By Chocolate 69
DeMentia 13
Flame Rage 747 (co-captain)
Goldie Bloxx 007
Mary Choppins 2112
Miss Lead 22
MISTILLA `the killa’ 16oz
Nawty Dread Knocks 422
Prosecutor 35
Sick Nick 7-eleven (captain)

Who’s who? Check out the picture on flickr with notes for each of the girls traveling to Austin.